e=mc2

By J Betty Ray, Sept. 2000


As I'm walking back from the parking garage , a homeless guy with big, billowing white Albert Einstein hair and a busted pair of kids' sunglasses with an alien sticker over the left lens gets right into my face. It's late afternoon and the sun behind him is blinding.

"Why are people so inconsiderate?!" he asks me. He reeks. A combination of alcohol, sweat and godknowswhat.

"I dunno man. I haven't figured that one out either."

"They don't think we have feelings?" he asks. "So I'm homeless. That means I don't have feelings?!"

He looks like he's about to cry.

"Maybe you should tell them that," I offer.

"OH! OH OH!" he says as he feigns a slap to his face and his hair flies everywhere. "They just look the other way!"

He takes his glasses off and stares me right in the eye. I'm totally gagging on the smell and his teeth are covered in weird brown funk. He's probably in his mid-forties, or maybe younger, and I can't tell if he's delusional, shitfaced, or the most lucid person on earth.

"When is it going to stop?" he seethes. "When. Is. This. All. Going. To. STOP!?" He is literally shaking his fists at the sky. "It's enough to make you want to stick your head in the toilet and flush!"

He puts his glasses on and takes a deep breath.

"Thanks for listening," he says as he straightens his tattered jacket and walks off.

"Sure, man, hang in there."

Thanks for listening.